The Irritations of Others are Really About Us

Quick.

What is the one trait that drives you most crazy when you see it in other people?

Is it laziness? A lack of organization? Being so uptight that it is difficult to have fun? Being wishy-washy about important matters? Talking too much? People who over-analyze situations or come across as know-it-alls?

Now, whatever trait you just identified, consider this: Many mental health experts would argue that the trait you most despise in others is the very same one that makes you feel most insecure about yourself.

That’s right.

If you dislike uptight people, it may be because you worry that you have the same problem. If you are irritated by a lack of organization in others, it may be because you are terrified of living in chaos yourself. When you are critical of people who come across as know-it-alls, this may be because you have a sense of insecurity about this behavior yourself.

Once you recognize this matter, you can work to begin addressing it in yourself. The problem, after all, is not with the people in your lives who make you crazy. The problem, ultimately, is with you and how you perceive their “problems” in relation to you.

When you can view your irritations as insights into your own mind, they can benefit and enlighten you in surprisingly helpful ways.

What do your irritations say about you?